I saw this quote on a friend's Facebook status the other day...
"Alaska is a magnificent, majestic, wild and beautiful land, patiently waiting for the right moment to kill you." Jerry Pippen
My friend is in to all kinds of adventurous stuff I don't understand. I'm sure there is an adrenaline rush attached to things like ice climbing and extreme skiing. But I don't have to go anywhere to be in danger of being killed by Alaska.
She tries to kill me every year in my driveway.
I've taken some legendary falls.
A few years back, I was hauling a box of heavy glass vases filled with flowers out to the car. I slipped on the ice, my feet came out from under me, my arms flew up, and the vases landed on my face.
Scared the beejeebers out of my kids.
Nosebleeds can make things look much worse than they actually are.
Ironically, I was on the way to deliver groceries to a battered woman who was hiding from her abusive husband. No joke. Ask my son, he ended up having to drive because my eyes were swelling.
One Sunday last year I was headed out to start my car before church. It had snowed the night before and I mistakenly thought there would be some added traction. I went airborne as soon as I stepped off the deck.
It was a rough landing. My hips hit first, and then my back. I remember consciously waiting for my head to hit. I was not disappointed.
I lay on the ice thinking I might be dead, have a broken back, or both. I thought about staying there until somebody found me, but I got cold. I did make it into the house; thankfully my phone was by the door.
I didn't make it to church that day, but I prayed quite a bit while I was in the emergency room.
Truth is...I really don't need Alaska's help when it comes to falling down.
One morning I tripped over Daisy while coming down the stairs. I fractured my big toe in five places and gored my arm with our unfinished stair railing.
Did you know the saying "I saw stars" is literal, not figurative?
But all of that is behind me. I have an important announcement to make. The treacherous ice between my front door and car door has officially melted. I have made it through an entire winter without falling down.
I think next year I"ll try ice climbing.