I had been getting phone calls from a guy at a bank I'm unfamiliar with. He works with new businesses and wanted to know if I had any needs he could help with. I did, so we made an appointment.
My banker was very excited to meet me. Like, very. He was exuberant; he was the Energizer Bunny in a tie. He was very knowledgeable, he treated me like I was important and he was ready to meet my needs. I liked that.
I’m not sure how our conversation turned personal, I told him I'm a Christian and where I go to church, and for some reason he told me he is living with his girlfriend. And honestly, I’m not exactly sure where my courage came from. Our conversation went something like this…
Me: “So, you and your girlfriend live together?”
Him: “We do! In my house.”
“How come you haven’t married her?”
“Oh, I promised her I would. But I want to save up enough money to buy her a really great ring.”
“You know, nothing says ‘I love you’ like ‘I promise to marry you as soon as I can buy you a ring that makes me look good.’ “
I really had said that out loud.
(Uncomfortable laugh from him.) “She says the size of the diamond doesn't matter, that she just wants to get married.”
“You should believe her.”
“Want to hear something cute? Her daughter gave me a ring for Christmas because she wants me to marry her mommy so much. Isn't that just the most adorable thing you've ever heard?”
It wasn't the most adorable thing I'd ever heard.
The conversation drifted back to banking; he wanted to show me how I can personalize my debit card so he whipped out his. It had a picture of him and his girlfriend on it.
“Is this her? She’s absolutely adorable. I'm surprised you're not fighting off other men."
(Uncomfortable laugh from him.) “What do you think I should do?”
“Grovel. Tell her you should have begged her to marry you before you ever moved in together. Beg her to marry you now.”
We walked over to the tellers, made my first deposit and concluded our business. He shook my hand and said, “Thanks, it’s been a pleasure being your business banker.” I looked him in the eye and with a grin said, “It’s been a pleasure being your conscience.” Then he said, “I promise I'm going to marry her,” and I said, “I'll be checking up on you.”
Isn't that so weird?
It troubles me that a beautiful young woman with a little girl would expect so little from a man who says he loves her. And that the man who says he loves her would give so little…under the guise of wanting to give her something so big.
I'm also troubled that some random bank customer he's never met would feel compelled to be so direct with him...and I hope she didn't come across looking like a big jerk.
I hope I didn't. He seemed to hear the things I said.
I came away wondering if someone somewhere was praying for that couple.
Someone is now.
Someone is now.
And I really, really hope he was glad he was able to meet my needs.